I do not have a drinking problem but that doesn't mean there isn't a problem.

I've abstained before but alcohol still sneaks it's way back into my life. Why? Because it's effects are subtle and manageable for the most part when you don't have a drinking problem. However, when you start really tuning in, you realise an almost imperceptible shift. Each sip is later a subtle nudge to an alternative reality where I am more anxious, less generous, and a shadow of my own self. I'm not a hardcore purest (this is not forever and I will drink a 0.3% beer if I want one) but I have cut alcohol from my life for the time being.

Today I am alcohol free and have been so for some time now. I have more capacity to reflect and take note. There is a growing body of energy born from this choice. That feels good. Like meditation it enables me to capture the whispers in the force, the subtle changes in mood, of myself and others. I am more able dive deeper into what the hell is going on.

If you see me on a terrace in the near future and I'm drinking a crispy white wine... know that I'm only human.